Saturday, February 14, 2009


Yes, Same Symptoms, Different Day.

Let's start off back on Thursday evening, I was feeling quite ill as usual and called my PCP, he gave me his pager number on my 1st visit to him, in case something came up and needed to talk to him. So anyways I paged him that night and told him how sick I was and how I had been doing some research online about my symptoms and a lot if not most of my symptoms fit that of Lupus. So he agreed yeah it did seem to fit, so he said he wanted me to have some blood work done at the hospital Friday and he'd have his nurse give me a call to set it up.

The next day, Friday (my birthday) I went to the hospital and had the blood work done, and continued to try enjoying my birthday, but still feeling so sick. Today Valentines day I'm still feeling bad except now I feel like I could go into a brain aneurysm or seizure because the dizziness was worse and I was having electrical type pain in my head with pressure and the back of my neck going into my head I was having tingling sensation, and also started running a low grade fever. This is HORRIBLE, why am I feeling this way? So I decided to call my doctor and tell him how I felt and see what he'd say, I apoligized from the beginning for even calling him, and he asked me what was wrong. He then basically tells me he doesn't want to be my doctor anymore. He isn't a "Specialist" and that he "doesn't know what to do with me anymore". That's when my heart fell to the floor and I almost couldn't speak because I was holding back the pain and tears, thinking "Please don't do this to me again" I'm so tired of starting over, and I'm not getting any better, only worse. ughhh.... So I kept apologizing to him for calling and then told him I just wanted to find out if the office would be open on Monday or not due to the holiday, and I didnt want to go the whole weekend feeling like this, and if it was ok to take a Klonopin. He then reassured me and said to take them, and he'd write it into my chart. Then he said he'd think about my case over the weekend.

I then got off the phone and took the klonopin, and just started crying. I'm running out of options and I told my husband, its scary to think that I might just have to die, or have a seizure, stroke or something in order to actually get a doctor to WANT to help me and try diagnosing my problem. But I don't want to get to that level, I want to try and catch it in time before it gets worse.

If anyone out there is actually reading my blog and knows someone who might be able to help me, please let me know... I don't want to die and I want to get better!!!

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